I am discovering that the next step to growing is to change the habits I have developed that supports my anxiety. I need to consciously decide a whole new way of living in order to break free of the old ways from when I felt forced into giving in to anxiety, depression, and agoraphobia.
I learned the more things I decide not to do because of the social anxiety, the bigger and more pronounced my anxiety becomes. All too often, I would decide not to do something because the anxiety and depression made things that were supposed to be fun to feel very uncomfortable instead. I had no idea I was feeding the anxiety to where it could consume my whole life. Being happy is still a hard thing to do. I realize now though that I have to do things that are a little and a lot uncomfortable just to keep the anxiety in check. The reward is not in conquering the anxiety, but in what we can build for ourselves inspite of the anxiety or because of the steps taken to surpass the feelings of fear and anxiety.