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Anxiety General Blog (62)

Sunday, 17 July 2016 22:37

Food Allergies and Panic Attacks

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I had my first panic attack episodes after experiencing anaphylaxis for the first time  from eating a mango on the fourth of July (wherein I also accidentally took too much benedryl  and the entire day was like a really bad paranoid trip). The week after I would get these fake anaphylaxis symptoms before I would eat fruit - my throat would tighten and go dry (I could not swallow unless I was drinking or eating), I had the "sense of doom", and I could just feel myself turn white and I would get a cold sweat. When this happened, I would just take a sip of water, breathe deeply a couple of times, and get back to work. On the weekend, I sat down and choked down all the food that had given me an episode - I could eat strawberries again! It took about an hour and a half to eat all the fruit and nuts I normally eat. So that stopped for a while. However, everytime I would think about a mango, I would get the fake allergic reaction symptoms. I practice martial arts, and on this past monday we were working on grappling, specifically arm bars which involves pressing down all of your weight on your partners chest, using that to lift your leg over. My partner was having a hard time making it fluid, so we worked on it for a while. The day after, I started having chest pain, and had my first episode not…
Monday, 20 June 2016 14:13

New Panic Attacks

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I recently just started having panic attacks, and these are multiple per day. All through college I had high stress and anxiety, but had never had a full blown panic attack. Now I'm working in an actual job where I'm trying to move up to a different role & there's a lot of things going on at once. Used to the job has stress but I could find ways of coping, but recently I haven't been able to find coping things that prevent the attacked. I know find myself panicking about everything and it's even waking me up at night and impacting my work. I don't know what to do or if I should see someone. Any suggestions or foods for thought?
Monday, 20 June 2016 14:13

New Panic Attacks

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I recently just started having panic attacks, and these are multiple per day. All through college I had high stress and anxiety, but had never had a full blown panic attacked. Now I'm working in an actual job where I'm trying to move up to a different role & there's a lot of things going on at once. Used to the job has stress but I could find ways of coping, but recently I haven't been able to find coping things that prevent the attacked. I know find myself panicking about everything and it's even waking me up at night and impacting my work. I don't know what to do or if I should see someone. Any suggestions or foods for thought?
Thursday, 16 June 2016 22:40

Wondering

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I have always been incredibly hard on myself, but I think now more than ever at this point in my life. I will be 27 this fall, and I feel like the walls are closing  in on me. I feel that my depression and anxiety are spinning out of control--and worst of all, it is hurting my SO because I have so much trouble controlling it. He tries to do much for me, and we have been in a frustrating living situation--and he is working to move us into an apartment by the winter. I got really upset with him because he wants to finish his minor which is going to probably take another six months--and I got so upset because I want to go back to college as soon as possible to pursue an associate's in creative writing with a minor in art. I just feel like there is always something preventing me from going back to school and that it keeps taking longer and longer and I just want to get out of this dead end jobs that I have been in for almost ten years. And I feel so frustrated with myself--so angry--because I feel like I am a selfish prick for thinking of myself. But--depression/anxiety is so hard in retail--it can really be a nightmare. Luckily, I think I have found a good for now job. But I want more--I want to go to college as soon as possible to get a degree in something that…
Wednesday, 27 April 2016 22:13

My story

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I have had anxiety in varying degrees since the sixth grade.   I can recall my first panic attack as clear as day.   I was in pre algebra and had no idea what to do so I just raised my hand.   I recall not even really being there but everyone starting at me.   My teacher asked if I felt sick because I was so pale.   I just nodded yes and went to the bathroom.   I later confided in what I deemed to be a good friend about it, now mind you i had no idea what "it" was at the time, so she spread it all over the school and it became a point of ridicule.  Beyond that I didbt years struggling with what I didn't know.   I had a harrowing childhood to say the very least,  I've endured every kind of abuse possible at the hands of basically every adult in my life.  Eventually I spoke to my mom about what was going on,  3 or 4 years after it started,  and age explained it sounded like anxiety.  Just knowing what it could be was the most freeing thing.   I was inevitably started on Zoloft.  I had adverse reactions,  became suicidal and was put in a program for troubled kids.   Well I once again confided it what I consisted to be another very good friend.   She spread it around that I went crazy, and once again my mental health was…
Wednesday, 27 April 2016 21:06

Simple Truths

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I learned the more things I decide not to do because of the social anxiety, the bigger and more pronounced my anxiety becomes. All too often, I would decide not to do something because the anxiety and depression made things that were supposed to be fun to feel very uncomfortable instead. I had no idea I was feeding the anxiety to where it could consume my whole life. Being happy is still a hard thing to do. I realize now though that I have to do things that are a little and a lot uncomfortable just to keep the anxiety in check. The reward is not in conquering the anxiety, but in what we can build for ourselves inspite of the anxiety or because of the steps taken to surpass the feelings of fear and anxiety.   
Friday, 22 April 2016 04:16

Questioning Everything

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Just had one of the worst panic attacks. I have been struggling with classes lately, and I feel like maybe I am not in the right field of study since I am struggling so much. I have already switched my major 3 times mind you. Recently I have been having thoughts like I am not doing something right and that something doesn't feel right with my classes like I am not doing what the future thinks. This has been stressing me out a lot and since I recently paid for summer classes and registered for classes next fall I have been having anxiety because I need to figure out and decide soon before I am taking classes I don't need and wasting money putting me more into debt. When I think about what interests me or if I could do anything I wanted what would it be, I literally have no idea. Also, the things I am interested in my grades don't show it therefore it makes me feel like I am not smart enough and that maybe I shouldn't be doing this because I feel like it's supposed to come easy. I know college isn't supposed to be easy, but I feel like I shouldn't be struggling this much even when being tutored or getting extra help from other people and the professor himself. I voiced my concern to my significant other and we talked about it. I He kind of had a tiny attitude because I keep blaming…
Thursday, 07 April 2016 00:35

past to now

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Nine years later , I finally can see the light. I feel like over time I have been in a tunnel so dark. I simply moved to work because I had to. I moved to care for my children because I had to. I had no idea of how lost I was. I turned to no one and recived no meditical attention. But yet the time was so dark and forgotten. Can one suffer in silence and not realize it? I kept busy to avoid thoughts. I know this now. Today my life seems so much meaningful. I still get feelings of saddness, jealously, anxiety. But the difference is I'm able to look past that. The future is bright. For the first time I have meaning. I'm not just simply moving. I'm moving with purpose with hope. There is a end. At the end is also the beginning. 

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