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Anxiety General Blog (64)

Friday, 22 April 2016 04:16

Questioning Everything

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Just had one of the worst panic attacks. I have been struggling with classes lately, and I feel like maybe I am not in the right field of study since I am struggling so much. I have already switched my major 3 times mind you. Recently I have been having thoughts like I am not doing something right and that something doesn't feel right with my classes like I am not doing what the future thinks. This has been stressing me out a lot and since I recently paid for summer classes and registered for classes next fall I have been having anxiety because I need to figure out and decide soon before I am taking classes I don't need and wasting money putting me more into debt. When I think about what interests me or if I could do anything I wanted what would it be, I literally have no idea. Also, the things I am interested in my grades don't show it therefore it makes me feel like I am not smart enough and that maybe I shouldn't be doing this because I feel like it's supposed to come easy. I know college isn't supposed to be easy, but I feel like I shouldn't be struggling this much even when being tutored or getting extra help from other people and the professor himself. I voiced my concern to my significant other and we talked about it. I He kind of had a tiny attitude because I keep blaming…
Thursday, 07 April 2016 00:35

past to now

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Nine years later , I finally can see the light. I feel like over time I have been in a tunnel so dark. I simply moved to work because I had to. I moved to care for my children because I had to. I had no idea of how lost I was. I turned to no one and recived no meditical attention. But yet the time was so dark and forgotten. Can one suffer in silence and not realize it? I kept busy to avoid thoughts. I know this now. Today my life seems so much meaningful. I still get feelings of saddness, jealously, anxiety. But the difference is I'm able to look past that. The future is bright. For the first time I have meaning. I'm not just simply moving. I'm moving with purpose with hope. There is a end. At the end is also the beginning. 
Tried and True.   I have decided to post a blog that I hope will become a resource for you all on this site. These are tried and true methods I have used to help me on my road to recovery. They are powerful practices that helped me when I could barely stand. I will first tell you the story of my mental collapse, and then my path to where I am today as well as give you information on products I used that helped and any free resources I can come up with.   Well, my story in a nutshell goes like this. I've always had anxiety. There were signs of it from a very early age. You see, my father had it as well as his father before him and as well as my mother. For the most part I skirted by not really being too horribly affected by it until after my mother passed away. Still, I was able to maintain. In fact, I was pretty outgoing. I made friends easily, I did stand up comedy, I did karaoke, never met a stranger. I would drive to big cities and not blink an eye for the most part. And then I met a man named Lee. You see, at first Lee was wonderful to me. He seemed so unlike the other jerks I had dated, but it would turn out that Lee would be one of the worst men for my mental health.   I always felt…
Thursday, 19 November 2015 23:43

Running Towards the Fight

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Hello! Welcome to my blog. My name is Brandie, I'm 28 years old and I suffer from anxiety and panic. I have always dealt with anxiety, but I have never had it this bad. It was triggered after the messy ending of a relationship with a man I was very in love with, but who just didn't love me anymore. This happened four months ago and everyday has been a stuggle to get back some semblance of normal. I am refusing any form of medication and am choosing to fix this problem through CBT, diet, excerise, and meditation. I don't make a lot of money, so most of my CBT is from me reading online ways to handle anxiety and panic attack. On occasion I can squink by and see a counslor at my local Catholic Church. I must say thought that I have made a lot of progress, albeit slow progress. I am proud of my progress because it was hard pressed through changing negative mental behaviours than achieved through a pill. I do not shame anyone for how they choose to walk their path, but for me, it is about taking all those mental behaviours that have been tearing me down for years and getting rid of them for good.   Today was a good step in that battle. I was having a rough day, had a lot of chest pain and just randomly crying a lot. Finally I decided I had to do something, so I pulled…
Wednesday, 28 January 2015 03:22

In the Middle of Anxiety...

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 Anxiety is many things. Those of us that struggle with it would never name any of those things in a positive manner. Instead we would say things like, anxiety is...   Tormenting Suffering Burdening Painful Exhausting Scary Confusing Lonely Life altering (negatively)   ...amongst many other negative things. But, what if I told you that anxiety can also be...   Inspiring Enlightening Empathetic Growth providing Strength Building Clarifying Life altering (positively)   Would you believe me? Somebody in the middle of an anxiety episode would probably say no. But here's the kicker...its in the middle of our anxiety, smack dab in the core of its intensity, that we can experience those exact things. That's right. Instead of feeling and experiencing all of those negative things, we can experience the positive ones. Or at the very least, we can have both. Now before you write me off as crazy, or someone who just doesn't understand, hear me out. This advice is not coming from someone on the outside who has no clue what it is like to suffer the anguish of anxiety. To the contrary, I have been at the brunt of anxiety and its many forms (panic, generalized, social, health related, phobias, OCD) for as long as I can remember. To make matters worse, I did not understand what it even was until I was in my 20's. Up until then I walked around internalizing everything and wondering if I truly was crazy. And, 6 years later, I am still…
Sunday, 30 November 2014 15:28

This is life

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 It all started eighteen years ago and life has not been the same since.  I was diagnosed with my first case of hyperparathyroidism which was actually a relief considering it took me nine months to figure something was actually wrong with me.  I went to several doctors and at least five different specialist and they all said it was stress and it was life.  They were all wrong, not their fault but they seemed it was better to label it as something instead of not knowing.  After more test they confirmed the tumor and removed it.  It was a quick surgery and I was out of the hospital in two days.  The main problem besides the tumor was the extreme intense anxiety attacks I have been having.  I never knew something like that was possible.  That feeling was so powerful and I never felt that scared and helpless.   The doctors told me that I didn't need medicine and I would slowely go back to feeling myself.  It took about 2 years from the time of my first panic attack to get to my surgery.  After surgery it was slow but I slowely started to feel a little better.  It just about ruined my baseball career and almost my drumming career.  The one thing about playing in a band was I could drink during shows which would completly eliminate any panic.  Which of course can be problem down the road which it eventually did.  After another eight years I started…
Sunday, 09 November 2014 12:25

Intrusive Thoughts that Scares Me Dizzy

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I've been bothered by intrusive thoughts lately and they are not your run-of-the-mill brain farts. They're the kind of thoughts that when it crossed you it will make you go ''What the f*ck was that about?'', ''Oh, gross'' or just plain ''No.'' pair that with anxiety and you got yourself one hell of a horror ride. Fortunately, they do go away, and your logical sense, and maybe even your sense of humor will rise above this distressing thoughts. Mine started when I was about to go to sleep, I remember that I was feeling pretty tense already and one thought popped into my head ''I think I'm going crazy''. My body immediately responded with an increased heart rate and further anxious thinking about going nuts. I went downstairs to see who I could talk to and expected it to be my brother as he is a night owl. I told him what was happening. Unfortunately my brother is very skilled at being a douche to me and told me scoffed at me and ignored me. From then on the intrusive thoughts have varied from afraid of bieng Schizophrenic, Suicidal, Incestuous, Murderous, and Ridiculous. Now, I would like to elaborate what triggered them so we can see how what anxiety does to you, how it blows everything out of proportion The Schizophrenic fear I acquired when  I was studying for the Psychometrician Licensure Exam (I passed by the way), and the topics involved abnormal psychology, so there we go. The Suicidal…
Saturday, 15 March 2014 00:27

Anxiety Breakthrough on Ayahuaska

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First of all I would like to say I am sharing this personal experience because I think this insight can help others suffering from anxiety. This post does not represent in any way the opinion of AnxietySocialNet as an institution. It is purely my subjective account of my experience on my first Ayahuasca experience. Even though I am the founder of Anxiety Social Net I am also a user like any other and as such I want to share this personal experience with the community.  There are certainly some risks especially for people taking medications or with a history of mental illness; you should consult your physician before trying any type of new therapeutic approach. Out of the closet   I've been meaning to talk about my experiences with psychedelics for a while, since they've been of great help for my own anxiety. For the last 2 years I’ve been seeing the general unconformity from ASN users with traditional approaches (especially with the psychiatric approach) and I really feel that I cannot withhold anymore the information I've been gathering in regards to anxiety and psychedelics. It is my brief that responsible use of psychedelics in the right setting may hold the key for real long term results in the treatment of anxiety, several new studies are confirming what I know from my own experience and it is time for me to take action and share this information with this community which I love and respect. The set (me) As some of…

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