I was diagnosed with anxiety disorder when I was in seventh grade. My anxiety only manifests itself through worry that something will happen to my mom. She is a runner and I have panic attacks every time she goes for a run...worrying that she won't return or something will happen. I know it is stupid and unlikely but I can't shake it. My mom is a bit wreak less. She runs or 3 hours deep in the woods by herself without a phone. She takes risks so it's not like I am completely wrong to worry. I am almost 20 now though and am leaving for college on August (I took a gap year to try and get a hold of my sanity!). I'm going 10 hours away and I'm terrified. I'm scared I will have panic attacks and be trapped up there with no one to help me and with no one to look after my mom. I am on Zoloft and clonopin and haven't felt any results even though it's been almost 2 years since I started the meds. I have had cognitive behavioral therapy and have seen multiple therapists and psychiatrists.
This anxiety is a constant battle. Every day I panic and worry and am controlled by this anxiety.
I know exposure is the best cure so I am hoping that leaving and separating myself from my mom and doing WHT terrifies me will ultimately cure me but I need advice on how to get through the months that are looming ahead.
8 years ago
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